Sadistic Soil Lover T-Shirts

'Anything else need tying up?'

Sana's Back with his soot eating grin.

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

"Bob! Your manure's here!"

Garden Shop: Top Soil. Bottom Soil.

'Good dog Spot. You're always there for me when the sand is hot.'

"Is it something I said dear?"

'Maybe he has some sort of mystic attachment to the soil.'

"I've been dumping bodies here for years, and it seems to me that the sea level is rising."

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

"I say we settle around here, there's no chemical aftertaste to the soil: Must be an organic farmer..."

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

'I know that's what your father calls it, Sweetheart...but a nicer word for it is fertilizer!'

"We want you to design the drainage system so that we have a muddy backyard..."

'Of course, I buy only organic foods... I like to be environmentally friendly.'

'Is it ok if I just bring in some of our carpet?'

'The old man's really serious about his rooftop gardening.'

Earthly Delights Garden Centre

I'm looking for a job?

'Try to relax, Ed. It's a beach, not sandy soil.'

This plant is a lousy malingerer!

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

For the new gardener.

"Oh, boy! My favorite! plotting soil!"

'So aunt Lois I hear you've developed quite a green thumb.'

"I don't know why I'm surprised, but you seem very down to earth."

Gardening Tips - allow worms to drag unwanted organic matter deep into the soil

'Really? A Bride of Satan? Golly, Lucille, why did you wait until our fourth date to tell me you were already married?'

'You can always recognise a true gardener - out there before the weather actually gets nice enough for venturing into the garden.'

"I know, it sounds like fun, but a 'mudslide' mentioned in the news is usually linked to a disaster."

"He's a chip off the old block."

Break up the hard soil around plants...and do everything possible to provide moisture...

"Oh boy! Looks like the farmer's just mixed in manure! Dig in!"