Rural Culture Pillows

Hillbilly.

'Hmm, an unreconstructed farmer.'

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

'Life is great' down on the farm.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

Farm Humor.

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

'Cool! Brownstar Wars!'

Lamb Noise.

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

"They’re real."

I fart more than that!

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"You were the one who thought it was too dangerous to raise a child in the big city."

"I always knew you'd come back."

You complete me!

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

'Dad, do you you think there's s**t on other planets?'

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

"I'm an enigma!"

Farmers' Warnings.

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

"I like New York, but I miss sleeping drunk on my front lawn."

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

Milkin' Impossible

"Ernie's full service salon and day spa."