Running Reader Gifts

A man reading whilst running.

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

'Don't believe everything you read in the papers!' (Vicar to lady reading the war cry).

'You always talk about robbing Peter to pay Paul, but you never mention Mary.'

'Social and political revolution? Check out our 'Do It Yourself' section.'

'I'm not working on a case, I'm looking for something interesting to read in the john.'

"I'm enhancing my appreciation for the knowledge gathered by humankind."

Ok, ok, last page.

'Nothing's happened today-read it dead slowly.'

'The only New Year's resolution he's still got intact is not to watch the England cricket team in Australia on television.'

"When in the course of human events it becomes... Oh, blast it! Adams is just going to edit the heck out of this..."

Book

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

'It's our latest line-suits for t.v announcers'

Pastoring for Dummies

Best Seller of All Times...The Holy Bible:'No fair. You're creating your own readers.'

"He's new here."

Today 5 -7. Meet the eAuthor.

'Just a minute, officer. I found a loophole in this law book!'

Graduate

'Can you read the story with more enthusiasm? You're putting me to sleep.'

'Would sir like to start with the hors d'oeuvres, or just go to the main corpse?'

'You can lead a horse to water, Ezra, but you can't...?'

'Of course I know how to read the water, but I my glasses fell overboard.'

"That's a nice little book. It didn't waste too much of my time."

Fiona Bruce

Police Academy - Remedial Reading of Rights

"You've really got to read this book, it's full of dynamite ideas!"

"They should open the files - Lenin never said all those crazy things attributed to him."

If you choose to read on a Kindle in the privacy of your own home, that's your business, but we're still calling the a X$%^ book club.

"I can't put it down."

Mao Zedong.

'Are these your civil liberties, Sonny?'

"The network's infotainment division thinks you should open with a song."

Gadaffi is the Last Man Standing