Rumor Investigator Gifts

'Well, it is just my opinion, but it's backed by the best rumor and speculation the internet can provide.'

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

"Some idiot spread the rumour that the boss had called in sick! Now look what's happened to the tobacco and coffee stocks!"

"I only told a few friends."

'Today on wall street, a rumor led to a rumor which raised fears of insider rumor-mongering.'

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

"Facts are good, but we need all the rumors, gossip, and speculation to fully understand the situation."

'I heard it through the grapevine.'

CIA Espionage

'We want to get maximum publicity on this, Klodnik, so release it to Wikileaks.'

'STREWTH! Our firewall is down!' (Rupert and James Murdoch cease to be shielded after Rebekah Brooks resigns)

"Evidence of Bigfoot or just some clown?"

Newscorp hacks into itself.

Press spy infiltrates Buckingham palace dressed as a guard.

'A WOMAN? -- Well, I'll be damned!'

"Quick - make something up, I've got a space to fill."

"It isn't just the media that's biased... often the voters are too."

"Boss, there's a rumor going around that someone lost a $1,000 bill in the cafe. There are like 200 people out there." "Interesting. And I assume they're all looking for the $1,000 bill. I assume they don't want anyone else to know about it before they find it." "I assume each of them is buying our food and drink so the others won't suspect they're here with ulterior motives." "I wonder who could have possibly spread such a rumor in the first place?" "Very bad man."

"Do you recognise the giraffe who hit you?"

'That was one of my all-time great rumors.'

"The Cheshire Cat has dentures. Pass it on."

'Rumors...'

"I can't approve of your office gossiping, Frank...and after you tell me the latest I want it to stop!"

Reporter #5: fire.

News of the Underworld

"Damned lies."

"No one else, huh! So who the hell is sending you a pigeon at four in the morning?!"

'What's this rumor I hear, that they're putting saltpeter in Meals-On-Wheels!'

I overheard management saying they were kicking you but I didn't hear if it was upstairs or out.

Reporter #2: plant.

Reporter #3: can.

'I hear there are some mighty big deer in these woods.'

Reporter #4: post box.