Rulebook Renegade Pillows

"Now get out there and underregulate!"

'Let's not go by the book.'

"Does anyone know where we keep the unwritten rules?"

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

'Oh, sure -- NOW you set boundaries!'

End school zone. Start unschool zone.

'That's not what is meant by a free kick.'

'All these new regulations will totally alter the way we screw the consumer.'

"That's my performance review!? Two thumbs up?"

'There's nothing in the rules about gloves.'

"Let 'em try to regulate this!"

'She kept pinching the Vicar's bum!'

Female Dominance.

'Mr Evans, I think we'd better reconsider our no-smoking policy.'

"I want you to start thinking back inside the box."

Exams

"Offside? By a fingertip? It's football not handball!"

"Where do you keep the non-educational stuff?"

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

"Why always a book report? Why not ever a TV show report?"

First fisherman says, 'What happens if the DNR finds us?' Other replies, 'Let's just hope they're into catch and release.'

Hot pink (and purple) monkey love!

'I think it's fair to say we're opposed to tame sex marriage.'

"I'm not looking for Mr.Right, Just Mr. Swipe-right!"

'You'll like it here...it's one of the rules.'

"Your businessman's lunch, sir - But you need to sign this compliance self-audit checklist first.

Leonardo Meets the I.R.S.

"And after I'm through with this, I'll show you the exciting array of other body-piercing services we're now offering!"

TV tie-in book signpost.

"It starts out with a standard romantic plot: Boy meets Girl, Boy loses Girl, wins her back, Girl kills Boy, devours his head and lays eggs in his carcass. Ok, now here's the twist..."

It says 'item is returnable if repackaged exactly as sent.'"

'Do I look as though I want to play Monopoly?'

It's 10pm. Same time it was last night at this time.

Confession. Terrible confession. My favorite kind. By day, I work at this caf