Royalty Humor Aficionado Gifts

'Scroll down, no sorry, scroll up...OK now scroll down again...'

'That's Lady Erica the courtesan's courtesan.'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

"All rise."

'I'm not saying he's unpopular, but the Secret Service won't let me wear spike heels.'

"Oh well, what does a jester know?"

"I've been bounced a few times, but never deposed."

'Sire, the jester is gesturing at you...'

'When did YOU switch to a talk format?'

'I'm worried sick -- the King just ordered a bunch of Benny Hill DVD's!'

King and clown engage in role reversal.

'What's the point of being king of the dogs if I still have to fetch his slippers?!'

'No, no, no - I said do me a ship in a bottle'

"King of what, exactly?"

"I'll need a volunteer from the audience."

'Let's see ... 'several monarchs form group to request World Bank loans' -- 'Kings Around The Dollar'.'

King reaching for an apple

'Remember when pitchers would walk on their own to and from the mound?'

'Yes Sir, we do believe 'the customer is king', but that doesn't give you the right to deduct a 'Peasant's Tax' from your bill!'

BRINGGGG!, 'I TOLD you to turn off your cell phone!'

'I'm afraid the only answer is a two-state solution.'

"It is not you. It is we."

"He's a Prince Charles Spaniel."

Joke of a lover

LUDWIG REX, 'I don't like it - It makes me sound like a hairdresser!'

'Mother's visiting next week, so I'd like you to lock up all the dissidents.'

'You guys are all pardoned - I'm putting in a wine cellar.'

'There must be some mistake -- Kings don't pay for things.'

Palanquin Toilet Break

"That's kingsize?"

'Hey -- this guy says we can skip capitalism and go straight to state socialism!'

'First you drop hints - if that doesn't work, you drop bombs.'

'We don't have the funds to build a huge statue of you, Sire - How would you feel about a bobble-head?'