Royalty Expert Gifts

'Come back later -- he's grooming his successor.'

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

Prince William and Kate Middleton

Spain's former King Juan Carlos goes to go exile over scandals

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

"He's a guard dog."

Czarcasm

"It is we."

"She wishes to range free!"

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

'I screwed up royally!'

"I don't suppose you get many sovereign rulers in here anymore?"

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

'Scroll down for the good stuff!'

DOWN WITH THE KING!, 'Do you know what the PENALTY is for disturbing the peace during wartime?'

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'

'You're reordering your priorities? -- Since when do you have priorities?'