Royal Supporter Pillows

"I've given up vegetables out of respect for Her Majesty."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

'Now that's an afro!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

King George I

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

Fairy Library - Cinderella Marries the Prince

'Sure, real estate prices are sky-high, but kings don't sell their castles, and that's that.'

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

The Unhappy King

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

Royal Love

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

"Someone should have warned you - he doesn't suffer fools gladly."

Reign Man

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'One can see the baby's crown!'

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

'But, dear -- Lady Godiva is part of my diversity program!'

'Nobody treats the king that way and gets away with it.'

'This year, Sire, I've created a socko narrative of scatological raillery and rollicking nihilism which ends with a sexy justification for third quarter losses.'

'He just outlawed his in-laws.'

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

"Enemies, yes, but doesn't your moat also keep out love?"