Romantic Satire Enthusiast Pillows

"Would you have a moment to take a short survey about your experience?"

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

'I wouldn't kick her out of bed.'

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

"It's perfect! You're a government redactor, and I'm a broadcast network word bleeper."

You're pig-headed, Louis, I like that in a man.

Prison Romance.

"This mask is a bit of a passion killer. . . !"

The Modern Damocles -

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

'No. It's not a past girlfriend. I'm a tort lawyer.'

The Unknown Philosopher, who first realised life is no picnic.

ENNUI...(smiley face).

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

"You've reached Randy, the dating doctor. What ails you?"

'Alright, let's do this.'

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

'Of course cutting back on this level of bureaucracy will require a lot of work...'

Well done, Harris. That's one of the straightest paperclips I've ever seen.

Valentine man in underpants.

It was love at first...

'Honey, it's me! If you want to marry me, please press 1!'

Hamlet.

Art Vandalism

The fat boy awake again

'Never to be seen again!"

'A role model? Yes, I suppose he was. Everywhere he went, people would say 'That's Bill Fenton... You don't want to be that guy!''

101 Positions/101 Excuses

Credible evidence!

Hunky Dory

"What was it that attracted you to me, Harold?..."

"We've been dating for five years. Can I have Thursdays off please?"