Romantic Rejection Gifts

". . . If a girl throws your prospectus in the trash, she's not the girl for you."

Mr. Chester's diplomacy

"Sorry, but she says she's not interested. She just wants to play the field."

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

An historic event in Candyland: When M met M

"I see Charlie's really smitten with that pretty thing in the flower shop!"

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

"We'll always have Paris. I backed it up on a zip drive."

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

'He has no romance. For special occasions, he gives me a coupon for a card and chocolates that will be 50% off the next day.'

A tortoise in love with a cat

Weekend Getaways with Ulrich

"I can't stand reality. What makes you think I'll enjoy it virtually?"

"The following program contains adult situations designed to make you feel bad about your life."

"She stood me up. I hosed off my Crocs for nothing."

"I don't believe you can't get close to anyone, Mr Jones. Get back over your own side."

"Whoa! That's a little clingy."

"Will you stop doing that please? Isn't it obvious to you that I just don't fancy him?!"

'No, no, of course I think you're beautiful ... it's just that, ever since you showed me those baby pictures of you ... well, I just can't seem to get those images out of my head.'

'I'm sorry I don't date people from other islands!'

A moose offers a woman flowers while she picks mushrooms.

"Do I love myself or is it lust?"

'Living together might work out, Randy, but I could never comply with a whole MARRIAGE!'

'No! Romance with malice aforethought!'

She realized with horror that she had settled for Les.

". . . and don't rush it. Don't make the same mistake your grandparents made. We were barely 95 years young when we got talked into marrying and settling down."

'Keep the windows closed. We don't like to encourage office romances.'

'You're afraid of commitment, aren't you, Steven?'

"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"

"Baldo, I'm sorry! Tia Carmen's friend Maria left this book here by accident. Silly me, I thought it was yours! Ha ha ha!"

"Of course I'm jealous of your last girlfirend Barry, have you seeen the hunk she's with now?"

"Hell, I'm from the dating agency. Can I move in with you."