Romantic Linguist T-Shirts

"You sure are ringin' my bell, Baby!"

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

Carbon Dating.

Ninedency: A budding tendency

"It's a play on words."

I think you're ace

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

"If x is the set of all men that love you, then I am a member of x."

'Single math professor in search of an intelligent woman. Send an example of your favorite equation.'

"The emoji she used says she loves me..."

"I know what you're thinking - all I am to you is a vector."

"It's always the same: We go eons without seeing each other, I think I'm finally over it, and then...WHAM! I get pulled into her orbit again!"

"Now that was post-modern sex."

"I always thought love made the world go round."

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

'Interesting article in Nature this week - apparently love's not a wave, it's a particle.'

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

"Of all the wet cement, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks in mine."

Intellectual Foreplay...

'Wine? Okay. I really don't care what you call it; let's invite over the two sisters from the cave next door.'

"Beats me why but my girlfriend says I have a one-track mind."

She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.

Novelist, writing her own vows... runs into writer's block.

"The best place to make black hole discoveries is in the bedroom."

"Of course I love you, I'm just busy with other men."

"Well, at first I didn't like him. But then his creepiness just grew on me."

'You use the former when wooing your beloved and the latter during negotiations with your divorce lawyers.'

"When you said you like to experiment in the bedroom..."

"My aloofness is a mask."

"The great thing about a science background is I can understand what you're experiencing in biochemical terms."

"This medical dictionary has had it's appendix taken out. . . !"

'Our love life has become market-driven.'