Romantic Jesters Pillows

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

'Do you always dress like this on the first date?'

"Nice shirt. Is it made of boyfriend material?"

"You don't being me flowers any more."

"This personal lubricant has an expiration date of 2025 - just saying."

"To the most beautiful girl in the world... Happy Valentine's Day!"

'Come here immediately and explain why you sent me only one Valentine's card!'

Intimacy - Breeding Ground for Mutual Grooming.

'I just wanted you to know how I really feel about you.'

'Can we have a table near a handsome man please?'

'Yes, they do contain e-numbers - But they're e-numbers that make you feel amorous!'

'I'm sorry, Dorothy. I've decided to marry your sister.'

'I'm not complaining, but the last time you took me out to dinner, Colonel Sanders was a brunette!'

'They're lovely, but I want you to know I never say yes on first negotiations.'

"I'm sorry...did I forget to mention? I must be honest with you. I have a condition. My doctor says I may need a full time nurse. But otherwise, I'm in perfect health!""

Genial youth talking to his sister's fiancée

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

Pretty girls listen patiently. They know you'll soon get tongue-tied and won't be able to talk anymore.

"I love a woman with a sense of humour."

"Now that we're into spring, we want to warn you that spring fever can be contagious..."

Richard the Turd

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

"I must come to the supermarket with you sometime dear, they seem to sell everything!"

'Wait while I slip on something more comfortable.'

"I'm treating you like a living deity for one day."

"They're a perfect match – she's high-maintenance, and he can fix anything."

'I'm sorry, Ralph, but you're going to have to move out - Prissy's allergy to your dandruff is getting worse.'

"I'm not very good at sex, but what do you say to eight hours uproarious sleep?"

Luring the babes is a cinch when you've got the right feet for the job.

Cave lady about cave boy with big rolling stone: 'Here comes Junior with his report card.'

'He's sending 2,400 roses to win her back, and charging it to her credit card.'

'Congratulations, you're now man and wife. You may club the bride. '

'Make sport of the Queen.'

'...Love, honor, and obey, no strings attached?'

"Will you manage my portfolio?"