Romantic Escapades Gifts

I need a Valentine card that proclaims undying love but doesn't commit me to anything.

"Gee, I'm sorry this had to happen on our first date!"

'The important thing to remember is we must forget this ever happened.'

"Loved our evening, Lou. Thanks for being rich."

Please give up this seat to a boyfriend more bored than you are

'...How could your wife possibly know we're in Venice?'

'I'm home early, Kim - I hope you don't mind sex in the afternoon?'

Frank was always thinking of new and creative ways to access a potential girlfriend's place.

Fourplay.

'Every time I see you, young man, you have a different girl on your arm!'

'What do you mean 'What would nanny say'?'

'I'm going to love having me in Haiti.'

'It's always the same with the newly weds - one night of passion and and they've got to be cut out of the mosquito net !'

'Not now, Lord!'

'Do you have anything that smells like 'prime time'?'

'I found it in the Khama Sutra...it's an old indian bondage trick.'

'Know any other bed-time tricks?'

'How's your love life, Stud Buddy?' - 'Not bad. I'm nailing four women at the moment.' - 'Isn't that a bit risky?' - 'Why?' - 'Well, what if they find out about each other?' - 'What makes you think I'm seeing them separately?'

Inside the Mind of Your Crazy Ex-Boyfriend.

'Do I know you?'

"I dreamt I was on a desert island with seven starving women."

"You should have told me you needed advice."

"Have you got any after ten tours for people who never get up before eight-thirty?"

"If my dad asks where we met just say 'on holiday'."

"Not tonight. The furniture is sentient again."

'It's our wedding anniversary today, Pete, I bet my husband forgets all about it, again.'

"How about we just stay in tonight?"

"Isn't it great that even with our busy schedules we still make the time to just be together and talk about everything else we should bet getting done?"

Saying Farewell To A Guest.

Servant girl sneaking out to meet her lover

"You're not much of a romantic, are you?"

'Two please-and I mean TWO boats!'

'The date didn't go too well. I should have taken her to a place that had more challenging placemats.'

'Let's go somewhere where I can be alone.'

"I swear, the only decent men around here are either married...or gay...or they're one of my ex-husbands!"