Rodent Humor Fan Gifts

Old Mice Aftershave

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

The americanisation of vulture.

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

"Author does not do tricks."

The only time cats are known to laugh.

'Oh Hi!'

"Mmmm! Bears hibernate in the winter. Cats can hibernate anytime we want!"

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

"I can't decide who gets the promotion, so we'll settle it with a rope toy Tug O' War."

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

Bases loaded, no outs. And coach once again turns to his trusty golden reliever.

"Excuse me ma'am, may I help you cross the road so that I can get the answer to this dumb joke my friend keeps telling?"

Great moments in art dogs playing poker, cats playing Pictionary,

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

'After years of practicing in empty theaters, Horace's dream of becoming a soft-shoe dancer seemed as remote as ever.'

Where Shaving Cream Comes From

"This isn't helping my migraine."

'Ha ha! No kidding! You're pretty much most people's worst enemy.'

Cat plays an arcade game that involves shooting at gun into a mouse hole.

"Don't listen to her! She's a cuckoo: what would she know about parenting?!"

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

'What happend? I thought you went to the dentist for a cleaning.'

Another Time Travel Pair o' Ducks.

'Sorry lady, can't help you: Yes, I can herd pretty much anything, but not cats, and certainly not kittens...'

Miami Mice

'...doomed...from here...to eter...nity...'

"I rented out the basement."

Cat leaves obedience school smiling because he got an 'F' on his report card.

'Boy, am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

Why giraffes hate winter

'What makes you think we have a radiation leak?'