Rod-wielding Zen Master Gifts

Never begrudge spectators their interest in your piscatorial prowess.

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

"River well stocked this year."

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

A Bloody Butcher

Zenemies.

Yoga.

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

Guru.

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

"Okay. . . so what's the bad news?"

"Show off."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Fishing - No. VIII

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

"Hoarder."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

'Tough day at the office! Somebody broke the water cooler!'

The Gardener's Calendar: Get Your Mower Out of The Shed.

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

Zenboni

'This is a spiritual journey, Buddy...not a road trip.'

Relax.