Rock Warrior Pillows

'The gentlemans washroom at the indoor bouldering comp'

I was going crazy at home. It's nice to be back here. You went from climbing the walls to climbing the walls.

Robert Fripp

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

"Well....I could've done this!"

ZZZZZZZ Top

Freddie Mercury

"It's from my first fight. So make the stitches big so I'll have a gnarly scar to show off."

Toothless Rocker, "Oi, play the guitar with your own teeth !"

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

Man looks at huge dinosaur fossil in garden, saying: 'It looks great in the rockery, but don't you think you should call the Natural History Museum?'

Jimi Hendrix.

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

Ray Davies

Ringo Starr

Yeah, I've been driving in circles for an hour looking for a place to park. Zamboni.

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

Joe Henry

The concert was going smoothly until Frankenstein's band played a ballad.

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

Jimmy Page.

Rock star uses phone on stage: 'Hang on Mom, I'm just putting you on speakerphone.'

Language purists bring correctness to a whole new level, forcing a name change for Ireland's most famous band.

'But enough of our golden oldies! Here's a new one we just wrote called 'Middled-Aged Hearing Loss!''

'I knew it was time to do something when I leapt from the stage to do some body surfing and the crowd parted.'

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

Roger McGuinn

"Sorry, dude. . . but you just don't fit into our group!"

Rod Stewart

Band Aid-style rock stars wear T-shirts that read : 'Feed my ego'.

'When are you going to give up this 9 to 5 nonsense and become a rock star like your brother?'

Santa Metal Claus

Pete Townshend

"Yup, nothing new under the sun."

'No you idiot! You're supposed to smash your guitar AFTER the show! What are you going to play now?'