Rock Smasher Extraordinaire Gifts

The Birth of Industrial Espionage. (A caveman peers over a small hill while another caveman smashes a smaller rock with a larger rock.)

He kept up his guitar practise...

"My mom says I can start a rock band if I call it 'I Love My Mommy.' You in?"

Guitar Man.

"...then finally, I got serious and started a band."

"Play dead!" "What a long strange trip its been..."

'Why is the guitarist doing a Jack Sparrow impression?'

'I wish his guidance counselor spent more time on college plans and less time suggesting names for his band.'

'Of course we've got Marshall amps Jim! Only the best up here.'

"After 10 broken keyboards, I finally bought him one that's designed for someone who bangs on it when they're mad."

Plymouth Rock

Harold was pleased to discover that his grandson was also a big tool fan.

'Here's one my dad wrote.'

'I told you I'd make you a star.'

Lou Reed

"This next song is for my ex-wife Joan."

This next number is when we smash our guitars...

Tony Iommi

Rock n'roll.

"A five, six, seven, eight, Mooooom!"

'While my guitar gently creeks.'

Rocking Panda

Django.

"I don't have a good ear. I should really invest in an air guitar tuner."

"This next song is for all the music teachers who said I'd never make it."

Steven Tyler's toothbrush.

'Your Dad phoned earlier and told me that this is how he wanted it fixed.'

Miss T-T

Musician hurts his nose.

Bootsy Collins

Dolores O'Riordan caricature

"And last but not least, organizational psychologist Ron Haynes, who limits my switching of guitars to at least every other song."

'Wow! Your band is loud!' 'We don't have to learn any lyrics!'

"The bad news is my doctor limited me to one glass of wine per day. The good news is I get to pick the glass."

Pink Freud