Patriarchy Smasher Gifts

"Remember, pretend it's the patriarchy."

Burger Queen: The Patriarchy is Dead.

'We used to be a patriarchy, but lately we've been more goddess-centric.'

"After 10 broken keyboards, I finally bought him one that's designed for someone who bangs on it when they're mad."

"I'm the kind of woman nobody calls pumpkin."

"And do you, Stephanie, promise to love, honor and 'obey'?

"No, Mr. Kurlander, I don't have, nor have I ever had, a recipe for cranberry muffins."

ABC. Uh-oh, here comes the penalty for early withdrawal.

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

'Do you promise to brush up on such matters as the Large Hadron Collider?'

'Another hit?' 'I'll stay.'

Musician hurts his nose.

''The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth'? -- How patriarchal can you get?'

'A glass ceiling?...Don't be ridiculous. The sign works just fine.'

"Sometimes I like to browse the men's section just to screw with the patriarchy."

Martial arts man chops bricks for workmen

"I'm really proud of my daughter. She's a thorn in the side of the patriarchy."

City travel agency: 'Send me somewhere with women who appriciate a real man!'

"Did we tell you? Debbie's going to be on 'Car Talk.'"

The two geologists lived only a stone's throw apart.

I love badminton.

Warranty Void

"How's your blogging going?"

Cricketer hitting ball out of TV.

"Imagine a world without men. No crime and lots of fat happy women."

"Good. Now punch in your password."

Destroying Music Speakers.

The idea that the firm is dominated by boring white middle aged male lawyers is clearly wrong...for example I know for a fact that Gerald wears a basque under his suit. And I used to be called Mary!

End Gay Stereotyping Now!

"It says here that sixty percent of women prefer chocolate to sex."

"Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's white cisheteropatriarchal standards of beauty."

The Birth of Industrial Espionage. (A caveman peers over a small hill while another caveman smashes a smaller rock with a larger rock.)

'At the tone, the time will be LATER THAN YOU THINK.'

'We've come to expect the drum beat of bad news, but are the cymbals really necessary?'

Now THAT'S a New Year's Resolution!