Rock And Roll T-Shirts

"Two Stones tickets, please, senior discount."

"Meet Elvis?? Sorry, but they were right. . . He's alive and well on Earth!"

Pete Townshend Vineyards

"Dude, I figured out why your solos sound so bad - that thing's actually a bass."

Golden Oldies Radio - Knock Three Times On The Ceiling If You want Me

Toothless Rocker, "Oi, play the guitar with your own teeth !"

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

How to smash a guitar.

"Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard"

Rock On

Will Curl Lip For Food

Post Office issues Rolling Stones stamps.

"This next one is a little tune about drinkin', druggin', and pickle ballin'."

'I knew it was time to do something when I leapt from the stage to do some body surfing and the crowd parted.'

'To be honest, rock n'roll isn't my thing at all, I'm much more a country n'western kinda guy.'

'Here's a song about a girl that seemed a lot less creepy when we wrote it 34 years ago.'

Oasis in concert with their swear box

Old Headbangers

Charts and Graphs Greatest Hits

"The Who used to smash up their instruments after their shows — have you ever considered that?"

"He's arranged to have his ashes snorted by Keith Richards."

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"

"Ah, here's some good news, Mr. Gormley. It seems you've been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame."

"It's our belief that Mr. Wetherall is one of the very few C.E.O.s in America who can do Chuck Berry."

"Howard used to be an Elvis look-alike."

"Iggy Pop? More like Iggy Grandpop."

"Negative, Captain. Conditions here extremely hostile to rockabilly."

"David Bowie, dead. Keith Richards, alive. Makes no sense."

The $68.00 comeback special

Dolores O'Riordan

Elvis fan holding a sign reading 'NOT MY KING'.

"I'm all shook up."

"Elfis"

"There he goes, against the advice of his back specialist."

Angel and Devil Music.