Rock And Roll Gifts

"Two Stones tickets, please, senior discount."

Born to rock.

"Meet Elvis?? Sorry, but they were right. . . He's alive and well on Earth!"

Pete Townshend Vineyards

"Dude, I figured out why your solos sound so bad - that thing's actually a bass."

Golden Oldies Radio - Knock Three Times On The Ceiling If You want Me

Castaways say; 'Now don't go rocking the boat Elvis.'

Toothless Rocker, "Oi, play the guitar with your own teeth !"

Elvis Purresley impersonators.

Old Mick Jagger.

Heavy Metal Scrap Merchants.

"Thank you Bob. Any questions regarding Bob's presentation on the actuarial tables?"

How to smash a guitar.

"Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard"

Rock On

"Hey. . . you there! I don't believe we've seen you here before! What are you King of?"

Old Headbangers

Elvis Presley

'I knew it was time to do something when I leapt from the stage to do some body surfing and the crowd parted.'

Ozzy Osbourne bites the head off a chocolate bunny at his easter concert.

'To be honest, rock n'roll isn't my thing at all, I'm much more a country n'western kinda guy.'

Blues guitarists gather at the crossroads

Will Curl Lip For Food

Oasis in concert with their swear box

Charts and Graphs Greatest Hits

"This next one is a little tune about drinkin', druggin', and pickle ballin'."

"The drummer's got to go - he's too loopy."

Buddy Holly

'Here's a song about a girl that seemed a lot less creepy when we wrote it 34 years ago.'

Elvis' feel-good eye doctor (Eye chart reads HEARTBREAK HOTEL).

Post Office issues Rolling Stones stamps.

The fifth Beatle.

Musician sings off key while his dog can only watch,his jaws strapped together

"David Bowie, dead. Keith Richards, alive. Makes no sense."

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"