Roadway Artist Pillows

Root worker painting a unhappy face on the road.

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Pirate

"Extreme miming"

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

Trump! The Musical

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

"And now, for your entertainment, I will drink a glass of water while Rempert, here, remains eerily silent."

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

Cygnets from Swan Lake

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

Tina Turner

Ralph Rackstraw HMS Pinafore

Magic Tricks

Midsummer Night's Dream

Encyclopedic Novel Slam.

Music Hall Dancers

"While you're at it Houdini, try and find the last ten years of my life in there."

'And the Dance Scholarship goes to...'

'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'

"How come there's no feel-good performance art?"

'Is there a psychiatrist in the house - the cast is very depressed over opening night reviews!'

"I stand corrected. Hard as you try, sometimes you just can't find the humor in a situation."

'Man it's a tough crowd tonight!'

Bill hits the ground running, makes a big splash early on, and rides a roller-coaster of insane popularity right into the "Where Are They Now?" Wilderness of Forgotten Celebrities.

"Is Madonna amazing or what? She sings, dances, and acts, and now it turns out she's a writer, too."

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

Interpretive napping

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'