Road Rover Pillows

"In todays driving lesson we learn the importance of checking your blind spot."

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

Halfway across the Hudson River Billy Joe realized he wasn't going to Elvis Island.

Fish talking about fisherman

Couple of Pikeys.

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

"Thank you for your e-mail. I will be out on a walk for the next twenty minutes and plan on barking remotely until my return."

Good boy

Walking the Plank.

'I've had a lot of experience at this. My Mom keeps the cookie jar on top of the refrigerator.'

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

Curiosity has landed on Mars.

'Attention!! All hands on deck!'

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

"Thanks for walking me home."

Life Discovered on Mars

'Who put that thing there?'

'The tales I could tell, sonny... I've marked my way across 7 continents, from the Kelly green hydrants of Belfast to the salty yellow curbs of old Shanghai...'

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

'What's the point? We're never going to be able to compete with online piracy.'

Pirates

A patient's heart monitor reveals he is thinking about fish.

"I'm sorry but the bubbles make me giggle."

"When I said let's scuttle her. I meant that ship over there."

"No, thank you. I'd prefer seeing a menu from the restaurant across the street."

'That's the guy - lives on a 'narrow boat!'

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

'D'you moisturise?'

Newly amputated arm points to captain Hooks' cabin.

'You seem to be very accident prone. We're going to have to drop your coverage.'

A frightened woman running from a cow.