Road Rover Pillows

"In todays driving lesson we learn the importance of checking your blind spot."

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

Fish talking about fisherman

Couple of Pikeys.

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

No need to be concerned, madam! I'm wrapped in cotton wool!

"Thank you for your e-mail. I will be out on a walk for the next twenty minutes and plan on barking remotely until my return."

Walking the Plank.

Good boy

'I've had a lot of experience at this. My Mom keeps the cookie jar on top of the refrigerator.'

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

Curiosity has landed on Mars.

'Attention!! All hands on deck!'

All the other land having been claimed and fenced already, Jedidiah bought his own range from the big box store.

"Speed bumps have reduced stampede injuries."

Life Discovered on Mars

'The tales I could tell, sonny... I've marked my way across 7 continents, from the Kelly green hydrants of Belfast to the salty yellow curbs of old Shanghai...'

"Thanks for walking me home."

'Who put that thing there?'

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

Pirates

'What's the point? We're never going to be able to compete with online piracy.'

"No, thank you. I'd prefer seeing a menu from the restaurant across the street."

A patient's heart monitor reveals he is thinking about fish.

"When I said let's scuttle her. I meant that ship over there."

'That's the guy - lives on a 'narrow boat!'

"The food must be good here. Look at the drool on the menus."

'D'you moisturise?'

'Do you remember where we parked at?'

Newly amputated arm points to captain Hooks' cabin.

A frightened woman running from a cow.