Ritual Researcher Gifts

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Ganges

Cave man: Early job frustration

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

"...and if you add wind-chill factor, the next plague will be even worse!"

Tragically Moses didn't see the eleventh commandment.

For the Wilsons, Gold Medalists Los Angeles '84, bathtime was always a ritual.

R.C.I.A.

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

Tourist viewing indian rain dance carries open umbrella.

The Wackoman (Heat it).

"If I ask you something, will you promise not to get mad?"

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

The Nargleys perform their post-holiday ritual of trying to blow all the needles off the tree in one breath,

"A non-virgin wold have had a devastating effect on crop yield."

Hold it, I think I need something more than "because it's traditional."

Do you kneel to pray in church? No, we stand up for our rites.

"I didn't say, 'Simon says'..."

"I'd love to, but I have a million lonely ritualistic things I need to do."

The Ancient Tea Ceremony of Astoria

Office Hazing

Today's Sermon: If you're unhappy with government intervention, try divine intervention.

'I just joined the Freemasons and I'm afraid you're our next sacrifice..'

"Ralph's over-interpreting the data again."

"Mr Shamani co-ordinates boardroom rituals."

"You've all abstained for at least one hour from any food and drink, except for water and medicine, right?"

Indian Face Painting

Nadal's bottles

Vicar with three taps: hot, cold and holy.

Lord Summerisle was a Big Jacko fan...

"It's part of His new diversity program."

Seder Plate Symbols Explained

'I have a rigid routine...sharpen pencils, organise desk, have writers block and start my nervous breakdown after lunch.'

"There is a man at the door who needs seventeen dollars to buy some sweet grass to burn as a spiritual cleansing agent during his prayer ceremonies."