Ritual Lovers Gifts

'I'm beginning to question the hospital's doctor exchange policy.'

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

The Nargleys perform their post-holiday ritual of trying to blow all the needles off the tree in one breath,

"An early spring was just a prediction- I can't actually control the weather!"

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

Folk Wedding

For the Wilsons, Gold Medalists Los Angeles '84, bathtime was always a ritual.

"Tia Carmen, I have a killer test tomorrow. Can you help?"

R.C.I.A.

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

"I'm treating you like a living deity for one day."

Maypole

"So, are you predicting an early spring?"

"Milton Woolburg, founder of traditions, legends, and general flimlam."

It's a tradition. On hole number 1 in the first round of the season, Ernie always says that's the best shot I've hit this year!

Shavuot - Like!

"Yee yee hee hee how how yip yip."

Tourist viewing indian rain dance carries open umbrella.

Time for Tea

The Wackoman (Heat it).

"We'd better get over there. The morning coffee scrum has already started."

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

Queen reigning.

"This computer uses artificial intelligence to think like a human being...so it needs coffee in the morning to get it going!"

Happy Hogmanay!

Do you kneel to pray in church? No, we stand up for our rites.

'I want a traditional church wedding but Sam prefers something trendy. Can we compromise and do it bunji-jumping from the steeple?'

"We don't make toys any more. I send the elves to buy them in China."

First Marriage.

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Ganges

'Oh no, it's not sex night again, is it'

'Not ANOTHER pub boarded up!'

Stonehenge Bowling

"We had this last year."

"Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, which may involve an occasional hot=dog-eating contest."