Richness Realist Gifts

'Know what's really grating?'

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

"It's a Wonderful Life" if it was written by scientists.

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

Depressed Businessman at Office Christmas Party.

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

'But I do have fun. I have lots lots of fun. I have lots of fun making money.'

"You will bargain away what little integrity you have left for what little job security you can gain."

I'm doing poorly, but that's without performance enhancing drugs.

"Just tell your parents you made the grade. Don't specify."

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

Recession

"Have you ever given any thought to what you're going to do after all your hopes and dreams are crushed?"

"Could you spare some change for a guy fresh off welfare?"

'Good news, Mr. Blume! Your condition isn't serious - just expensive.'

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

"I'm not particular, I'll take any job that will replace a human."

"Financial Adviser advises client 'I advise you that you're broke'."

Squeezing a tight budget...

"I'm the ghost of your future retirement."

"Goodbye cruel world."

US Dollar weakens.

'Our retirement program is that you can resign whenever you want to.'

Retirement Issues

"You asked to see me, boss?" "Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here." "I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7." "Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that you're publicly performing the theme, they may sue the cafe for royalties." "Daaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh daaaaaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh... wait, what?" "If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun."

'This is how our new no-risk pension scheme works.'

'I re-invested what was left of my 401K into returnable pop cans. I figure by the time I retire I should have about three dollars.'

'Look at my new overdraft its fantastic.'

"Monogamy? In this economy?"

'The bad news is that the dollar is down -- the good news is that nobody seems to have any.'

'Management doesn't think we have a staffing problem...Apparently all we need to do is to use our imagination.'

"Who would have thought retirement would be this much fun."

'Be advised the information herein may not be current and is subject to change. Past performance is not necessarily indicative of future results.'

'That's not in addition to your pension, that IS your pension.'