Revision Rebel Gifts

"Writing is... rewriting."

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

'You have to STUDY for tests, dummy -- you can't just put a memory stick in your ear!'

Wrong answer

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I gotta be me!"

'I really crammed last night.'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

Make your resolutions achievable.

"The next song was sixties anthem for the youth subculture of revolution, anarchy and anti-establishment...and can now be heard in elevators worldwide."

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

'I miss telling people they can't have a day off to be with their sick children!'

"We needed to replace our kitchen floor and it kind of grew from there."

'What have I made for dinner? A reservation at the restaurant down the road. . .'

'But I did study. I guess the software didn't install successfully.'

DIY enthusiasts find a time portal behind their old wallpaper

"I hate this time of year."

"I told you he'd enjoy that more than a Gameboy."

'What's the point of a bookmakers if there's nowhere left that sells books?'

Good luck in your A Levels.

"See, Honey, I told you that TV would fit in this room!"

New! Paint Bombs: 'Light the wick, and you have paint that's extremely easy to apply!'

"Anyway, to make a long story short, I'm the guy who invented CliffsNotes."

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

Sleeping on the Job

Unabridged Dictionary

Study more to pass more tests.

'In my opinion the series should have stopped after the first 3 books.'

Hipster Police Department

"I'm sorry, Uncle Ed. I just couldn't save the poor ol' thing. You want to shoot it, or shall I?"

Wait! It might be cheaper to just knock it down and build from scratch.

"Look at these old clothes, Dylan! You know, tie-dye HAS made a comeback!"

Lady convincing her husband to have wallpaper instead of plaster.

'What does he know about turning a profit? He wasn't even at Woodstock!'