Review Riposter Gifts

"Before I begin your six-month review, I want you to know you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say. . ."

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

"Heads up! It's another tidal wave of overwrought critical hyperbole!"

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

'I'll show you mine, if you show me yours.'

"It's just one bad review and we all know who wrote it."

'He's been back packing around India and doesn't he want everyone to know it.'

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

No, no, Grok, we love your creative voice! Ort is just here to do a little punch-up.

'Those viewers who disagree with our editorial on TV violence has better keep their big mouths shut!'

The Music Critic.

Man from 'National Viewers and Listeners Association sits at work boxes titled; 'Switch on' and 'Switch off'.

Reviewing a Scientific Paper - Etiquette for References.

The Critic...

"What did I think about the play? About an hour too long!"

"Oh-oh...the way she said 'Jason'...I think its time to define the relationship."

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

"How was the play!"

How's my Sermon . . .

"You call that a suit?"

"Writing that book was a real strain."

"They're going to print a retraction - your desserts are not inconsistent."

"I don't mind if something's Shakespearean, just as long as it it's not Shakespeare."

'It's had the best reviews I've ever written.'

"Take away his brilliant prose, and he's just some depressed guy."

'Try not to jerk when you come to the end of the rope.'

"Do you have a menu sorted by relevance, average customer review, and price low to high?"

Editor

"But you got some good reviews too, yeah?"

'It feels good to make a difference.'

Music Review. Editor. How did you describe the chamber music recital? "A thrill a minuet"!

"Leon rents out his time machine to people who have to go back and 'un-day' stuff that's now considered offensive."

"Touché, Roy. A snappy riposte will be winging its way to you as soon as possible."