Retirement To The Countryside T-Shirts

'It's 'baa baa' here and 'baa baa' there, until I'm just about nuts.'

"Ahhh... close enough."

Allotment

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'Life is great' down on the farm.

'Cock-a-doodle-do!'

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Country Bumpkin.

'How very Cumbria.'

Amusement Park Fun (Country Style).

It’s God’s country, if your God wears camouflage and dips tobacco.

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

Walkers

I fart more than that!

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

High Riders of the Old West

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

'I want to immortalise the area in a painting before it is changes for ever.' (Artist is scooped up by a digger.)

"You were the one who thought it was too dangerous to raise a child in the big city."

"The homes in this area are beautiful."

I wouldn't mind so much, but it's all junk mail.

Thatched roof car.

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

Summer in Elysium and The long vacation in Arcadia

"We should get out to the country more often."

Holiday cottage

"See, dear, it's only an owl hooting...."

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

That private little woodland walk you used to love now with a: Visitors' Experience Centre!

A Gated Community.

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

Last Chance for Everything.

A newspaper stand in a rural area.