Retirement Fun-seeker Gifts

"It's a real pleasure to do business with you..."

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

'All those in favor of requesting a government bailout, say 'Karl Marx'.'

Retired Canadian t shirt guy.

"However, we're doing rather well, according to uninformed sources."

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

''No other gods before me'? Oh - You're one of THOSE types.'

'Even More Disciples'

Jesus breaks the bread.

'What do you call money that slides off the collection plate?'

"Don't knock Florida! Where else can a 73-year old man get a 35-year mortgage?"

"What the hell did you do with your day before I retired?"

'There it is! I've isolated the origin of the firm's demise.'

Pensioners run riot on mobility scooters.

'But I think shopping three times a week is more than enough exercise!'

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

'Stocks gyrated today on news life is full of suprises.'

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

Sale - All Junk Bonds 50% Off.

Sounds of the market hitting all time highs. . .

"There's corporate me and there's me, and, by God, we both know how to have fun."

'Does he do anything besides watch the money?'

Late Bloomers

To make taking their daily array of medicines more fun, many seniors are using the new Pill-A-Pult.

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

Shareholders Meeting - I don't like the look of this year's annual shindig.

Looks like another hostile takeover...

'One really nice thing up here is that it's always very easy to get an audience with a Pope.'

'Fathers Day.'

Cross Umbrella

'Consider it part of a stimulus package. Do a good job cleaning out the gutters and you get the hole box.'