Retail Sleuth Pillows

"You're right - the shipping isn't free. They've folded the expense in the cost of the item."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Maybe it's now time to review our customer care strategy!"

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

"I hate it when they put kittens in the impulse buying section."

Orderly Conduct of Sales

Low Hanging Fruit

Alphabet soup

"Why is this cart so heavy?"

"Have you heard something that the rest of us don't know about?"

Retail Worker's Thanksgiving

'Look! It's Trendy Vineyards' Merlot Window Cleaner! Streak-free cleaning, because it's 50 proof!'

"All these vitamins and nutrients, plus it makes it own sauce! We should be eating this!"

'I'm sure they make it up in volume.'

Checkout for $385.00 or more.

Shopper sees sign: Buy one get ripped off.

'The price or the biscuits?'

"It's two sizes too big, but it fits."

Exportation and importation in Cuba

"...so if my maths serves me right, if I buy four of these it won't cost you anything"

'You must have something in my size?'

If you don't see what you want, buy something you don't want!

"I don't need one, Gracie. My shopping list is very simple! Things I have a coupon for and things that are on sale!"

'Let's rush him.'

"Good news, Grossman. As of today, short sleeves are O.K. around the office."

Psychology in Action - on sale at $10.95.

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."

To avoid malnutrition, throw away the contents and eat the package.

"I'm a bargain hunter."

"That 'Spirit of Christmas yet to come' comes around earlier every year..."

"Apparently, some of the additives cause a nerve disorder, but others cure it."

"I'm not saying the lamb is good, but nobody's complained about it yet."