Restaurant Scene Admirer Pillows

Waiter' You betta stop that food fight, you SILLY fools! Here comes the Maitre D' !'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"War is hell and so is this soup."

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

"How fresh is the calamari?"

Your lobster was off!

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

Advanced footsie

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"I like to sit facing the room to see if anyone seated after us gets served before us."

'It's my favorite.'

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

'Strong curry for two and a fire-extinguisher.'

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

"Your meal sounded nice."

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

"What kind of biscuits are they?"

"I think we'll pass up the Château Mouton-Rothschild '34."

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

'The braised toucan was fine...although I found the bill a little large.'

"Can I interest you in a great white?"