Restaurant Owner Pillows

"He feels he can do more good working within the system."

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

"And don't try to pull the old 'good wine steward, bad wine steward' routine."

'Great idea, Pete!'

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

Sandwich board with, 'Free lunch at Arnie's' on the back and 'There's no such thing as a...' on the front.

"Well Lucky, for starters, I think the horseshoe was a bad idea."

"Keep in mind, this dish is best served in a restaurant cooked by anyone other than you."

Overzealous health inspectors.

'There are no prices listed, Sir, because the prices keep going up and up.'

"I'm sorry, but your restaurant has failed on a number of issues"

"Here's some baby spinach - from my soil to your plate."

Ed's Restaurant - Closed. Get Over It

'Are you sure this fish is fresh?'

'What's the catch of the day?' 'Hepatitis!'

'Human-rights issues aside, you will soon enjoy the benefits of trade with China.'

'I don't get it...Our business model was exactly the same.'

'Yes, sir, we do have a smoking section.'

'Aw, cool! Look! They got us a hot tub!'

Sheep with wine - Mutton Cadet

"We give it time to get its affairs in order...then 'whack!'"

Farmed Salmon Restaurant - Everyone squashed together.

Bottomless bowl of soup

"O.K., I'm ready. You can let it go."

'It's not Spanish dancing - he's killing cockroaches.'

'The lower-priced items contain genetically-modified foods not yet approved for human use.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

"Smoking?or non smoking?"

All-You-Can-Eat Buffets: Overeat Here.

'What's wrong with those fish?'

'We're really sorry!'

Diner

'No! Not rare, not medium, not well-done: I want my steak raw! Thank you...'

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

'Well I can assure you sir, the fish was fresh when the menu was printed last tuesday.'