Restaurant Crawler Gifts

"Would you like a professional critique of your orders?"

"This place has the best happy hour."

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

"Vintage? What would you like it to be?"

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

"I just realized you're my entire entourage."

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

You got that beer that the monks make, didn't you?

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

"Vindaloo hot enough?"

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

Naval Veterans Drinking at Greenwich Pub

Beers

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

"I come here for the pepper."

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"An everything Martini, please."

Best Before 5th Pint.

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

'-and you're living proof that ALL men are not born equal, runt!'