Restaurant Explorer Gifts

"This is delicious. I'm glad I didn't try to order in Italian"

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"

"Seat yourself. Grab a menu. Take any table. Hey, you know how to cook?"

Bottomless bowl of soup

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'Michelin stars? I don't think we have any, but one of the tires on the catering truck might be.'

"And your tofu, would you like food with that?"

"We pride ourselves on being a very unpretentious establishment."

'You've been studying the menu since early morning, surely you must be ready to order!'

'I like a table next to the action.'

'I'd appreciate it if you'd order the Chef's surprise. We don't get all that much excitement around here.'

Man chooses his lobster.

'Who orderes the roasted chicken plate and who ordered the soup?'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

"What do I recommend? Try the prime rib at the restaurant across the street."

'You look bored, sir - How about the Chef's Surprise?'

'Heads it's mortgage payment, tails it's 1st growth Bordeaux.'

'Apparently there's a nice little Italian round the corner.'

'Choose your flying fish.'

'We're eating out, let's go.' 'But I thought you were making...' 'The only thing I'm making is you miserable if you don't get the car keys right now.' 'Oddly put, but very clear.'

Did you slice this beef? You nearly missed.

'I eat in a different restaurant every day.' - 'I don't tip either.'

Do we have a reservation this evening?

'Hey, wasn't that kind of them, giving us a free sick bag just in case?'

"The after-dinner mint is the boss's idea. I think it's superfluous."

Haute Chinese

'Then that's one child's plate, one special, and one anything-as-long-as-I-don't-have-to-cook-it.'

"What do I recommend? Get your coats and go to the restaurant across the road!"

"Are we dining fine, quick casual, bistro, family style, buffet, fast, food truck, box or bag?"

"Waiter! There's something in my soup!"

"A table for two? Let me see... Yes, we have a table for you at the beginning of 2025. Do you wish to set up a instalment plan on the booking order deposit?"

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

"My name's Karezog, Despoiler of Worlds, Devourer of Souls. I'll be your server tonight."

"You'll find out what the chef's surprise is when you get your bill."

Todays Special: Beans on Toast #2.50 (use of tin-opener 10- extra. . .)