Research Loving Reader Gifts

'It's kind of depressing: We've spent three years on this research paper, and probably only ten people in the World will ever read it...'

Cat rolls up yarn like power cord.

'When I asked you to do research for your assignment, I meant the library not on Google!'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

'Which wine goes best with 'the old man and the sea'?'

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

'It's nothing that a few stem cells and 75 years of research can't fix.'

"I'll be honest... there are books by James Joyce that are easier to follow than these bad boys."

'Second grade. When did you discover 'LMNOP' wasn't one letter?'

A man with Dwarfism is reading Little Women.

Library door sign says, 'We have encyclopedias ... the original Facebook!'

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

A man and his dog both reading.

Idle parts

'It doesn't take much to please him these days.'

Monster Self-Help

'Is there a psychiatrist in the house - the cast is very depressed over opening night reviews!'

Peer-reviewed journal publication.

Megabyte Information Processing Center.

'Don't worry, he'll soon grow into it.'

dog reading EKG

'A positive review of the book and a negative review of the presentation.'

Sex Section in the Library

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

The Curious George pop-down book

A lab rat stares back at a scientist.

Flower lamp.

The Farmer Sutra.

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

'Jack wants to stay home and rad books, and I wanted him to take up roller skating, so we compromised.'

'Dear, when I die, what ever you do, don't donate my body to science.'

"Now don't expect any miracles. I'm only a para-scientist."

A new book with a little bit of this and a little bit of that.