Repeat Performance Artist T-Shirts

Obsessive Compulsive Support Group: 'You check the tea bags, again, I'll check the biscuits, again.'

A fairy with wand and crown in pink tutu

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"Extreme miming"

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

'The good teen-age mime chooses to study for an exam, while the bad one chooses to steal hubcaps.'

In, out, shake it all about.

May all your birthday wishes come true..

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

Encyclopedic Novel Slam.

Bill hits the ground running, makes a big splash early on, and rides a roller-coaster of insane popularity right into the "Where Are They Now?" Wilderness of Forgotten Celebrities.

Double Saxophone

Interpretive napping

"How come there's no feel-good performance art?"

'Oh no...I'm living the dream.'

Treading a fine lion.

Performance In The Bedroom

Their father would frequently have to barge in and pantomime to his kids that they were not being quiet enough as they pantomimed actual noisy children.

"The museum of modern art on fire... an installation."

"We're in a dying industry, and you're just sitting there! Well, I'm going to do something about it-I'm starting a Web site."

Funding Cuts for the Arts

Pottery Slam

"When the boss says jump, I say how high."

"Can you just once get to the damn point without the usual embellishments?"

'The actors guild suspended my membership.'

"They're texting it in."

Welcome to the wonderful world of abstract mime.

Actor talking to unimpressed child

'I need you to start thinking outside the imaginary box.'

"The judges aren't too impressed!"