Creative Performer T-Shirts

Interpretive Cheering

Double Saxophone

"This next one is my own quirky rendition of Berlioz's 'Symphonie Fantastique,' Movement 5, 'Dream of a Witches' Sabbath.'"

Grace Jones

'I like how the band are not afraid to experiment.'

'We've run out of one-man plays - why not make it up with the rest of the drama group?'

A violinist adds balloons and bells to her bow.

Seth Schubert, Concert Harmonicist

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

They hated me.

Showbiz Awards

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen. Summer's almost over

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

"Extreme miming"

Pirate

"This next one is called 'The Sermon on the Mount.'"

"We're following Carrot Top."

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"I had a fear of speaking in front of people, which is why I shadow puppet and sing the lessons."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

"An actor, you say? Guess you caught the acting-like-a-waiter bug."

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

George Michael

Cow Show Tunes

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

"I'm the only sane artist in the world."

Clown waits for 'Happy Hour' to begin.

This next song goes out to the girl who stole my heart and my guitar.

Jazz is Invented

'What? You ate the gateau instead of throwing it into my face?? You insensitive, egotistical brute! You don't love me anymore!'