Repairing Equipment Gifts

'Hello, Biggo Farm Equipment? How much longer is it going to take to get my manure spreader fixed?'

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

Jack of all trades

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Tool Box

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

A DIY disaster.

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

"Lovely dovetail."

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

'I think I've found what's been causing my funny buzzing sounds.'

The world's most unemployable family

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

Lazy plumber.

Bob’s Museum

Computer operator welding machine.

'Certainly. Here's the break-down. Seventy-five dollars for my labour. And seventy-five dollars for you impersonating a plumber.'

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

"We've run all the technical stuff and found the cause of the funny sound coming from your computer."