Rent Vs Rebound Pillows

'I can't decide whether to pay my rent this month or go to the basketball game.'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Gary turns 40.

'...you said, 'it only gets a bit damp when it rains'!''

'Well, the rent is a bit more expensive than usual because there are only 1 327 482 other tenants...'

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

"And these are the Andersons, our tenants."

House hunting is cruel.

"She's about to get him on the rebound."

"I need an apartment just big enough for a laptop, a coffee cup, and me."

"The landlord has promised to sort out the damp problems."

"Okay, so the current occupants are being tormented by supernatural forces, but they do agree to pay closing costs."

'We decided to rent out the back room until the baby comes.'

Letting agent on the phone: 'OK, so there's fungus in the bathroom - but on the plus side, it IS organic.'

'I won't lie, it can get windy here.'

The lessor of two evils.

"It's a new rent concept - fifteen minutes for a quarter."

"The previous tenant has gone away for a very long time."

It's a nice apartment but I don't want to pay my share of the national debt for rent.

"Five more minutes, I was dreaming our apartment was rent-controlled."

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

'Here is the lead-based paint information, Fair Housing criteria, laws regarding tobacco use outdoors, slip-and-fall warning, and, barring any further public hysteria, the lease itself.'

'Sorry...I don't deal with lease issues.'

'I'm presuming by the amount of rent you're asking for, it includes a full-time butler, maid and gardening staff!'

'Water is included with rent.'

'Here is the lead-based paint information, Fair Housing criteria, laws regarding tobacco use outdoors slip-and-fall warning, and barring any further public hysteria, the lease itself.'

"The Bank has returned the rent cheque marked 'Insufficient funds', but it doesn't say whether that's them or us!"

Tenants and Landlords - 'Are we nearly there? ...'

Leonard Cohen calls his landlord

Generation Rend. Young man rending his garments in anguish at extortionate rents.

"He's moving out when he's saved up enough for a deposit on a flat."

"Well, thank God it's not the plumbing! Let's run down town, drop off a check and sign that lease!!"