Reluctant Scholastic Gifts

Back to school anchor

"Bad dog."

"I got tired of 'Moby-Dick' taunting me from my bookshelf, so I put it on my Kindle and haven't thought of it since."

"I tried getting good grades without studying, but it isn't working."

"That was one of the hardest exams ever. I don't think anybody got a good grade."

'I had a great year and I wasn't even trying.'

The Boys of Indian Summer

'I failed history again. I guess those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

'Your mother and I want you to know that you wouldn't be hurting our feelings if you decided not to go to University.'

The middle school mile claims its first victim.

Desk boxes: 'In', 'Out', and 'What ever'.

'Studies show that most boys my age don't like to read. Who am I to tamper with statistics?'

"You'll be pleased to know you haven't got any homework this evening."

"Sorry... My School Aversion Syndrome is totally bad today."

“Okay, Cindy, don’t think of it as learning ... think of it as a software upgrade!”

'It has nothing to do with relativity. He's trying to figure out his cable bill.'

"When I hear the word mathematics I immediately think of three things. Boring and useless."

spellchecker

'Before I read the investment committee's report - I would remind everyone that I never asked to be on this damn committee.'

"What did I learn in school today...I learned I don't like school!"

'Derek's a big fan of resisistance workouts. He always resists working out.'

"Son, we didn't spend a fortune on your education so you can 'just be yourself.'"

"Enjoy my first day at school? You mean there'll be others?"

"I have to write a book report for school. . . do you have any books with lots of pictures?"

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

'I'm going, but if school didn't have a 'Kids Get In Free' policy...'

"The only thing I like more than running is everything else."

'Who cares where Waldo is?'

Man Readig Paper

Summer Reading

"My physical therapist says this is the worst possible position you can lie in."

"The long wait for greatness to be thrust upon one."

'I'm not counting the days 'til school's out. I don't do math unless they make me.'

"Mom, don't believe it. It's Fake News."