Reluctant Camper T-Shirts

"John's never been a fan of the static caravan."

"I am not asking for directions."

'This is where we go to get away from it all. . . except for Stanley's money.'

"I'm sorry- I can barely hear you with this goddam ocean behind me."

"Make a sandcastle with you? Of course darling. What about Thursday 3.15pm?"

'Sure, sure - I'm having a great vacation.'

'How's the water, dear?'

The US election is over.

No you can't get out yet. You've only been in there for three hours

'Why are you still sitting here, dear? This is a tropical getaway. It means, get away!'

"I didn't know it was poison ivy. It didn't have any warning labels."

"Endless Summer III"

Hot flashes

Airline concerns.

'I'm sorry I didn't come to work yesterday, sir -- somehow, it seemed like Sunday.'

Excess Baggage: Forcing your homebody spouse to accompany you on a business trip is generally not a great idea.

I just don't trust those self-flying brooms yet.

But, mom, I don't want to go to summer camp!

'I must confess I admire people like you...Executives brave enough to say 'No I need a holiday.' I don't care if my clients look elsewhere, I'm not going to sacrifice my leisure time to climb the slippery pole to the very top...'

"Go join your coach and the rest of your team. I'll be watching from the bar."

"You know your problem, Monte? There's more to life than always checking how your stocks are doing."

'Why is it the one moment I choose to relax you walk in?'

"Yes, it is true! I've finally persuaded Derek to take a holiday."

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

'Not Andy. He'd rather do anything than go on the family vacation.'

"Is there a discount for someone who doesn't want to see the movie?"

"Sorry, dear, but vowing NOT to climb Mount Everest this year isn't a valid New Year's resolution."

Hunting - Man asked to go hunting by his wife

'Ah! This is the life...' - 'No phones. No computers. No hassle.' - 'All I have to do is lie out in the sun...' - '...and fret endlessly about skin cancer.'

"Let's go somewhere fun and not really experience it."

Travel Agents - Water, water, anywhere with water.

"Oh, how I ...give me a push... hate Mondays."

'You can't do this to me, Arlene! -- I'm not the outdoorsy TYPE!'

"Every year it's the same story...dangerous situations. Slippery slopes. Inescapable traps. Horrible creatures. But I trudge forward because no matter what...it's hard to avoid the first day of school."

"We can't stay. Charles freaks out without some electronic device beeping or blinking at him."