Relocating To The City T-Shirts

Madison Avenue and Maple Street

'We need to change our luck. Let's move our headquarters to Redmond, the home of Microsoft.'

'Looks like Reginald wasn't kidding when he said he's going to start urban farming on the roof...'

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

Of course I always start off by wooing a prospective candidate with talk of stimulating work,great colleagues and a reasonable work life balance...but the winning argument is always when I promise them enough money to choke a rhino.

While You Were Out: We Moved!

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

'I remember when all this was fields.'

"Your animal companionship is here!"

'It's a sign of the times, a high rise block of caves reserved for hermits.'

"This city is becoming unlivable."

Entering Megalopolis - next Bucolic area 162 miles.

'Hmmph. Here's an ad for affordable housing five minutes from downtown. By what means? Learjet?'

Blok drives by New York City.

Converted Parking Garage

"Look, Martha—you contribute, I contribute, we all contribute to the pulse of the city."

"Ernie's full service salon and day spa."

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"My family argues so much over living in the city or country that it makes me feel like pulled pork."

'Honey, I'm home.'

'I can remember when there were only farms around here.'

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

"Is your dog friendly or socially maladjusted?"

Animal immigration

Entering New York City - Check it out

"You're moving into a place where all the parents live well and all the kids test well."

Welcome to the urban farm. A bit of country in the city.

Progress.

Urban lunch

On today's Ask Sadie Radio Hour, we discuss one topic: the constant flirtation with fleeing to Canada. Canada has universal health insurance, far fewer killings, much less bigotry, more social mobility, better schools, less obesity, 50 weeks maternity leave, blah blah blah. But that means nothing, because you know what they don't have? Panicky media telling you who to blame for the sky falling! We'll be back, after this message from Depends Undergarments.

Nest building

"Yes, I appreciate that it's a converted fire station. But I still think I'd prefer stairs."

"I don't know-somehow the city seems much scarier than when I was a kid."