Religious Rule Challenger Pillows

'What about three-day Sabbaths?'

'Of course homosexuality is not a sin, handsome.'

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

The ten ammendments

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

I'm not substitute teaching after all. How come? They wanted a criminal background check! I was a principal for 15 years. They know me! Yes, but

'It's just like New-Time religion, but recognizes sin.'

'I think we're going to need an ANNOTATED edition.'

"I'm looking for loopholes."

Woman Bishop with vacuum cleaner. Vicar saying 'It's to appease the traditionalists.'

'They sent me home from school because my lunch was out of compliance.'

Corruption trial in the Vatican

"Please turn to page 38 in your hymn-or-her books." The feminist cause marches on.

'This is a coffee break, Caldwell -- Get rid of that damn teapot!'

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

'Doesn't this 'chosen people' thing sound a little nepotistic?'

"It's the appendix to the Ten Commandments: The Ten Ultimatums."

'What did you say? 'The light is nothing but an ordinary streetlamp'? Oh no! My own son is an atheist??!'

ASBOs

'You may be serving Him up there, but don't forget...I'm boss down here.'

'He always breaks away from the Church on Sunday mornings.'

Kiss My Ring

God is dead.

"From now on it will be God, the Holy Non binary, God the Holy Cisgender and God the..."

"If I were your god, I'd have fact-checked this mess before publishing."

'Wow, that's great! The house rules say pets ain't allowed here!'

BLESS YOU

Do not abuse the Lawn

"The Bible does not say that!... And if it does, it's taken out of context!... And if it isn't, it's just a metaphor!... And if it's not, it's not a big deal!... And if it is, then that's just how things were done back then!... And if... er... shut up

Warning.

'Excuse me, ma'am. Pets aren't allowed in the store.'

"Of course I believe in tithing, I'm just easing into it."

"The school rule of 'No cellphones in class' does not impinge on you free speech, Kevin."

God Rules OK.