Religious Pun Lover Pillows

'Here you go -- Don't say I didn't warn you.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

'He did it for us.'

'Read about Samson & Delilah. . . Better yet - see a live demonstration.'

"Be home soon, Dad....I'm just ordering tomb service."

"Does he have bills to pay as well then..?"

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'Let's see here... Mr. Stevens... it says you slipped in the tub and hit your head.'

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

Dogma

"Perhaps if you guys just swam along behind us for a while."

"He refuses to use these now they've made them gender nonspecific."

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

'Please take your receipt!'

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

'Turn the other cheek, reverend.'

"I was kind of hoping just to tell them what they want to hear...."

"He wants us to start calling him 'Head Honcho'."

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

"Dearly beloved, and others..."

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

Om and Ommer

Nativity - The sitcom

"I've got dominion, I've got dominion..."

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

Male On Sunday

When The Seven Deadly Sins Come Knocking.

Pre-nuptual Nativity

'So long as he doesn't preach what he practices.'