Religious Observation Gifts

'I couldn't decide what to give up for Lent, so I gave it all up.'

"He's no hat and all corgis."

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"He doesn’t say much, but he thinks a lot."

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

"Hurray! I discovered a new planet!"

'Let's see what they're screwing up today.'

"I think he just ashed on me."

"Of course I attend the meetings but I'm more of a lurker,"

Does Christianity have the monopoly on morality?

"I knew there was something wrong when he stopped reading the obituaries."

"Holy moly!"

A child and a babysitter gazing out of a window

"You will not gain any sympathy from this court by offering to give one-tenth of your haul to the Church."

'Fourteenth century church, fourteenth century views.'

'Watch this space.'

'Have your daily bread every other day.'

Shy Man at Party

Sushi bar Chef: DARN Sushi train spotters!

This looks unusual, but these things have a mind of their own.

Man sees line of priests entering Mass Transit Authority.

"'Smoking' or 'Non-Smoking'?"

''Fasting' doesn't mean eating fast food!'

"I'm not beached. I just don't swim on Saturdays."

"As a Christian, it's my job to love everyone. Especially people like you who don't deserve it."

'See that, Greg? His back is straight. Both feet flat on the floor. Eyes fixed on the game. It's natural talent, Greg. You just can't teach that.'

Nice to see you!

Repent Ys Who Has Sinned Against ME!

At the Olympic qualifiers for staring out the window

"They're all down there sentenced to an an eternity of fornication, licentiousness and intoxication."

'Sorry, forgot to warn you. Regular season starts next week. This is just an exhibitionist game.'