Religious Inquirer Pillows

"Perhaps we should accept her invitation to church. Then ask the priest questions during the sermon."

"Um, I notice there's nothing in here about pork."

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

'Is there an E-Reader Edition?'

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

"Lord, thank you for guiding me through the whole 'evolution by natural selection' thing."

"Yes, but you were the defender of the wrong faith."

The joy of sects.

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

'Is there a God? God knows...'

"I couldn't afford health insurance, so I became a Christian Scientist."

"If atheism is a religion, why hasn't it broken up into splinter groups who murder each other?"

'Psst, buddy -- Apocrypha!'

"Just my luck."

"How long has he been missing?"

Religion & Economics.

'If it's all the same to you, we'd prefer not to get involved.'

"I've been asked to dance on the head of a pin" "Yeah, you and an infinite number of others."

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

"OK, so you've told us what God thinks... but now I'd like to know what YOU think!"

"And lo, we made God in our own image.."

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"I do hope you're here for the circumcision."

"I can't sue my insurance company because it was an act of god? Well, then, can I sue my church?"

Vicar losing his place in the sermon.

"What happens to our soul if we're taxed out of existence."

Atheist United - A Non-Prophet Organization

"Consititutionally there's no bar to marriage. I'm C. of E."

'I can't take off my clothes - I'm Missouri Synod Lutheran!'