Religious Critique Fan Pillows

"Christian Conservative Church Today's sermon: 'Thou shall not judge: any straight, white, Republican man.' The rest of you are going to Hell"

Obey the Book or be damned!

"You atheists wouldn't exist without God!"

A surprise in heaven

"Why did we run out of wine?! I'll tell you why...Mary's son brought 12 of his friends who crashed the wedding party! That's why!"

Two Men Discuss Ministers.

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

"At first, I was teaching Job a lesson, but now I'm just messing with him."

"Of course there's an afterlife. It's called 'death'."

"At the time I thought it was a goose."

"I'll convert. What does the attorney general recommend?"

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

"According to the breathalyzer, the wine definitely represents your blood."

The Calmocracy

"And now, a few words about the feel-God factor"

Thwarting the Boys from Brazil

"Hallelujah!"

A Man of Faith

"Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about that?"

Moral Outrage.

"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned." "Give me all the juicy details."

"Can we discuss this?"

LIBERAL MEDIA POLLS, 'Do you think President Obama is doing a great job, a wonderful job, or an absolutely terrific job?'

Trump Bible photo op

Religious toilets.

"I want to take a vacation, but the last time I left you in charge your face appeared on a grilled cheese sandwich."

'I propose a day of mild exasperation in response to Richard Dawkins.'

Tony Blair in the morning and George Bush in the afternoon. Lulu and Stan were having a good day.

'The Bishop called - he'd like to see a copy of that sermon you gave last Sunday.'

'Can you prove it's your hat?'