Religious Community Seekers Pillows

"Let's start a small group."

"It's a letter from the Vatican. They say that whilst walking the streets without stepping into dog poo is nearly as miraculous as walking on water, it's not sufficient to canonize me!"

"Sure - After the aggressive guys wear it all out!"

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

"That's our new church mascot."

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

'What is the meaning of poorly attended staff meetings.'

"The only thing I'm sensing is an entrepreneurial spirit."

"Your sins are forgiven, but not your co-pay."

'Get an afterlife!'

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

"You're on mute."

Promised Land Signpost

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

"I told you it was a universal truth."

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'

Alternative Medicine. Group Hug.

Heaven's Ingredients: 100% Natural Love, 100% compassion and 100% forgiveness.

'So, I take it that diversity isn't a priority?'

'Never, NEVER sneeze while you're levitating.'

'My son was nailed to the cross and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.'

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

"Eve, do you realize that neither you nor I ever had a childhood?"

'Is it ethical to pray for an amicable divorce?'

"That's what I love about the game - it's so social."