Religious Believer Pillows

"You're definitely descended from the apes. I'm descended from Adam and Eve."

Night-time halo

"They're SUPPOSED to have a disparate impact!"

The ecumenical dinner party.

"What did Jesus order?"

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'I'll let your people go when they're fully pyramid-compliant!'

"No, the Trinity is not the Father, The Son, and the Preacher's wife."

"There Adam. Isn't that a lot more comfortable than that silly little fig leaf?"

Moses parting the waves and trolleys appear on the sea bed!

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

"Not only should science be Bible-based, Creationism, but also math, Roman numerals!"

Attila the Nun.

"You're correct, God doesn't need your tithe, but the church does."

"Stupid HR says you can only fire them..."

"Hallelujah!"

Honk if you're holy.

'I believe you're thinking of leaving us, Brother?'

"Do me a favor, chief. Next time you carve something in stone have it spell checked first."

"Oh, I know He works in mysterious ways, but if I worked that mysteriously I'd get fired."

"Great news! It's a light touch regulatory framework."

"Boy, the sooner she realises the only authority I obey is the Bible, the better!"

'But everybody does that stuff!'

I defend to the death your right to say things I agree with.

'No offense, but some of these sound a little PREACHY.'

Decisions a Pope makes

"No, we can't have a lawyer look at them first!"

'I've got the inside track ... But the Devil uses the big freeway.'