Relaxed Royalist T-Shirts

"Technically, I'm guarding two posts."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

Man is caught swimming on an inflable float in a moat by the knights.

"Chair looks couch potato friendly!"

"Just go with the workflow."

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"Just the slippers is fine!"

Trivia/Great Literature.

"The nest may be empty, but our drinks are full."

'The market goes up, the market goes down. And that's our business report.'

Zack Brillard and Live-In Companion

"…Ommmmmmmmmmmmmoooooney, heh, heh, …ommmm…"

Wearing bras in 2020.

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

"Just sitting here widening. You?"

Wonder what the shareholders are doing today...

Man reading on top of giant pencil being carried by others.

'The Stock Market opened today, but just barely.'

Old man in rocking chair playing golf

Martha Stewart at Home.

TV announcement: 'The Consumer Product Safety Commission today announced the recall of all E-Z Reclino-Mat chairs sold between ...'

'When did the world get into such a big hurry?'

'I outsourced toymaking and delivery, fired the elves and moved my headquarters here to the Cayman Islands.'

Success Without Effort

"Don't worry, she's still alcohol aware."

'I don't see how you were able to work for so many years. Since you've retired you can't do a thing.'

'Saturdays in paradise.'

"I have a low-cost project you can which you can involve yourself with."

'Having a lot of underlings doesn't make you an overling!'

'You go and take stacks of photos. I'm going to read and I'll look at them when we get back to England.'

'Now that we've moved to this nudist colony, I suppose we should send everyone a change of undress notice!'

He kicked the door down --- It must not be Opportunity.

Hammock resting on books.

'Relax, there are thousands of us working today: Nobody will notice that the two of us are slacking off...'